A Post About Nothing Of Importance -
Posted by blog goddess | Filed under Uncategorized
I have decided i sleep far too much
therefore i end up doing nothing much on weekends apart from sleeping, banging on the treadmill, watching Friends for 3 hours and eating. I have started living in my own filth as a result of this compulsive swine behaviour.
I have decided its time i follow the fine examples of my peers like Chlamydia and Jong who wake up about 6 hours earlier then me on weekends despite going to bed at the same time as me (i am convinced they are cyborgs, nobody believes me). So THIS saturday, regardless of what time i sleep on Saturday morning, how much i drink on Friday night, how damn exhausting my week has already been…im going to wake up at 10am, clean my sty, change my mouldy sheets, transfer all the clothes from my arm chair to my cupboard, make love to Stevie, and THEN go to Chlam’s house and help her paint her room!!!
anyway today i have devised an elaborate scheme to leave work at SIX. mainly with the help of paper cuts, coconuts, a Decepticon and five chips, i am going to escape my superbly messy desk and head home to make love to Stevie and have a nice fullfilling, cartiladge destroying, ego uplifting run around Clark Quay.
yesterday i ate my body weight in that fucking addictive xiao long bao from Crystal Jade ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xiaolongbao) So i also resemble a bao now. But that really wont stop me from eating more xiao long bao because its a freaking orgasm in my mouth when i eat it. seriously, how clever is a xiao long bao?! soup…in a bao! genius!
*****post scriptum: plans to leave at SIX may be foiled by Mr Boss. he seems to have infiltrated this plan by taking an extra long time to read final draft of submissions which means hes going to fucking kill me when we discuss it. in the words of your average Singaporean…”sure die lah” / “mati laaaaaah”
*********post post scriptum: its 9 minutes to SIX. obviously i wont be able to leave. weep, weep.
**************post post post scriptum: i am apalled at the nonsense i write on this blog. really why am i so self serving.
